I am, for the most part, a prim and proper blue blooded Yankee. However, I currently live in a town that is a bit more down country then urban. Our biggest news story this week is about a monkey named Chico.
The Feds first had interaction with Chico the monkey in 2005 when they went to check out a fake diploma ring. The little critter threw feces at the officials the entire time, their response give the monkey a stern look and say “PLEASE DON’T THROW YOUR POOP, ILLEGAL MONKEY”
Chico ponders throwing feces (THIS IS THE REAL CHICO)
As to be expected Chico did not listen, and for three years plotted his revolt. A week ago he escaped into his affluent neighborhood. Chico’s first victim was a 18 year old Japanese exchange student. The small animal continued to throw poop, bit two others, and hid in the trees keeping officials at bay for hours.
The real Chico has had a taste of youthful fear and he wants more!
Everyone in town is obsessed with this news story, Chico is truly the talk of the town.
I wish I could quit you, Eddie
2b1b: The sardonic voice of 20-somethings everywhere, Monday through Friday.