A very zen approach to having a panic attack.

I'm Fucked: A Series of Haiku Poems
by Meghan McBlogger

Labor Day was brief,
Conference calls and dog-walking;
Can't turn off my phone.

Early to rise and
Scramble to put out big fires
Not of my making.

Mr. Foxx once said,
Blame it on the alcohol!
My boss prefers me.

Communication
Is the key to good business;
Got no Blackberry.

I emailed you twice!
Saturday nights reserved for
Red Stripe, not email.

I shoulder the blame
So my boss looks less inept,
Hark! It's Saint Meggles!

Scene from Rock of Love:
Don't throw me under the bus!
My boss is Lacey.

An office full of
Executives not so pleased,
Thank God for Xanax.

Feeling depressed I
Struggle to courtesy laugh;
You aint no Saget.

Oh, VP of Sales!
I've met you one-thousand times,
You should know my name.

I anxiously wait
For Boss number two to come.
Enter, Diablo!

What would Diane say
If I get fired today?
Goodbye apartment.

Twirling and whirling
Sliding down the pole with ease,
A limber new job.

A silver lining!
No dress code and finally
Some health insurance.