I know it’s Drinking Game Friday and it’s Eddie’s turn to rock it, however, it’s only 10:31 in the morning, I have ZERO work to do today and my world was just rocked. So I turn to the blog to exorcise my emotions and pass the time.
I have this problem where I know an actor but I never connect the dots that they are in other movies. But I know it’s the same actor in those other movies. This is hard to explain so, case and point: The Great Jared Leto Debacle of 2006. In my mind, there used to exist 5 different Jared Letos.
#1: Jared Leto of “My So Called Life Fame”
I knew that this actor’s name was Jared Leto. I was a fan of the show and loved the character of Jordan Catalano.
#2: Jared Leto of “Requiem for a Dream Fame”
I knew that this actor’s name was Jared Leto, I knew I was a fan, but I did not connect him with the Jared Leto of “My So Called Life Fame.”
#3: Jared Leto of “Girl Interrupted Fame”
I knew this actor’s name was Jared Leto, I knew he was famous, but I did not link him to the previous two Jared Letos.
#4: Jared Leto of 30 Seconds to Mars Fame
Again, I knew that this heavily eye-linered guy’s name was Jared Leto, but I did not realize he was the Jared Leto from “MSCL”, “Requiem”, and “Girl Interrupted”.
#5: Finally, I just had an overall abstract concept that there exited in this world an actor named Jared Leto. I couldn’t really picture what he looked liked, but I knew he was a famous actor.
One day in the car with my college friends, we were discussing Jared Leto (and I really don’t know why,) and it dawned on me that these various Jared Letos were the same person. And it blew my mind. I then had an embarrassing outburst of, “Jared Ledo…OH JARED LETO! LIKE JARED LETO! AND JARED LETO! JARED LETO JARED LETO JARED LETO! WOW!”…And then I got laughed at, and deservedly so.
Well as I’m sitting here, bored as shit making snowflakes out of post-it notes and wondering if my dress is showing too much cleavage, I had another break through. This time involving Julie Benz. There exist three Julie Benz’ in my mind and I just realized all three are one in the same.
#1: Julie Benz of “Jawbreaker Fame”
#2: Julie Benz of Darla from “Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fame”
#3: Julie Benz of Dexter’s girlfriend fame in “Dexter”
It’s these small and pointless little “woahhh the universe is heavy man!” moments I have that make me wonder if a.) am I retarded? b.) do I have ADD or it’s hyperactive cousin AHDH? and c.) am I really that vapid? This is like the time I watched “I Heart Huckabees Fame" with a group of people. After the movie, everyone was sharing their thoughts on existentialism, and my only reflection on the film was "Dude...Jude Law sounds funny-like with an American accent!"
Sha la la!