This PSA brought to you by Tulane Chris and specifically not Meg, who loves a good Red Panda Kabob

In recent months, I’ve changed spirit animals, ditching the querulous Chaya Goldfarb for something ultimately cuddlier and less likely to call me a son-of-a-bitch while hogging the vermouth. My new spirit animal – an actual animal, this time – is the Red Panda. A few key quotes from Wikipedia should explain why I feel an affinity for the Red Panda:

- long, soft reddish-brown fur on its upper parts 
- blackish fur on its lower parts 
- mainly nocturnal and is largely sedentary during the day 
- generally quiet except for some whistling communication sounds 
- In captivity it readily eats meat 
- does little more than eat and sleep 
- very heat sensitive (I once got too hot during an “intimate moment” and vomited on someone’s screen door) 
- a very attractive or cute animal


Tulane Chris, haggard after an evening of bum wine

Forget living a past or future life as a Red Panda, I’m living a current one. Like most cute, weird animals, (for example, me, if I can’t find a job after school) Red Pandas are endangered. Tomorrow, Saturday the 13th, is International Red Panda Day, an event promoted by the Red Panda Network, a non-profit working in the USA and Nepal to protect and conserve Red Pandas largely through coordinating with local Nepalese. I just found out about this yesterday, so I didn’t have time to coordinate with them and see what they need, but they have a lot of resources on the site (for teachers especially) and panda products.

They’re also the original panda, discovered by outsiders several years before the giant or “overrated” panda, to whom it may or may not be related. They also mate in captivity without recourse to Viagra or low-budget pornography (one of our few differences, if I’m honest), so hope is higher for the future of the Red Panda. Don’t force them to resort to show-fighting to survive.



Anonymous said...

TGI Hagman..............?

Max said...

Oh! He's lovely. I don't get how those lazy giant pandas got to be more popular. I shall definatley be embracing International Red Panda day tomorrow.
Also, sorr about being stupid, but what's PSA?...panda spirit animal..?

Anonymous said...

Public Service Announcement... but Max, I think Panda Spirit Animal is SO much better! :) hehe

Unknown said...

I need to finish making Chris that poster

Anonymous said...

so.... can we just call a spade and spade and make this chris' blog?

Anonymous said...

I wish I could donate money just to Tulane Chris.

molly said...

this is so weird. i work in nepal for rpn's partner organization. we share office space with them. i read 2b1b every day, and my laughter often peals through the office. i would show them this post, but...yeah. the nepali sense of humor is a little more...conservative.

Laura said...

1. Red Pandas are ADORABLE! We happen to have them at our janky zoo by my college and I love them!

2. Real pandas (not even worth capitalization) fucking blow. They won't have sex to survive, they eat stuff with no nutrients even though they have pointy teeth, and they get confused and eat their young. Just save our money and let them die.

Denise said...

I don't know who Laura is, but I like her.

Amy said...

I know who Laura is but I like her anyway.

And she's right, red pandas are SUPER adorable.

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