So, as per usual, I'm sick. I called out of work yesterday and spent the majority of the day in bed snuggling a box of Mucinex and a bottle of Gatorade. (Clairitin D < Mucinex, by the way. Hardcore.) Boss #1 gave me attitude when I called out (which is infuriating, given last week's shenanigans) so I decided I better man-up and come in today. Boss #2 called this morning to make sure I was feeling better (read: to make sure I actually showed up) and I was irritated until she told me the most glorious news:
MARK THE BIG GAY CO-WORKER GOT FIRED YESTERDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Replace Carleton with me, and the Bank's living room with my office and you pretty much have a scarily accurate depiction of what I've been doing all morning:
Although I'm pretty sure he got fired for bailing on a bunch of important meetings, I'd like to think my midnight drunken gossip session with Boss #1 about what a giant turd he was played a major part in the firing as well. And my mom said my negative attitude wouldn't get me anywhere...
Welp! Off to plan a last minute lunch and happy hour for Boss #1 while trying not to snarffle all over everything. God I'm attractive. Hearty posts for the rest of the week, I totes swearz it.